Sunday, April 6, 2014

Part 1: Divorcing A Narcissistic Personality

The comfort of acceptance vs. the comfort of dysfunction. Narcissistic people have been conditioned to believe love involves angst and suffering- the heights and depths of drama – to the extent that feeling bad feels normal.

In other words, if her background is dysfunction the likelihood of her adult life being dictated by her own desire for that drama and dysfunction to continue will be immense.
To an abusive BPD/NPD, “winning” is about taking from others, hurting and controlling them. In order for her to win, you must lose. Relationships are zero sum games. She does this by:
  • Taking something away (e.g., money, love, material possessions, self-respect, self-worth, etc.) 
  • Destroying something you love (e.g., a prized possession or a child.) 
  • Forcing you to take something (e.g., abuse, infidelity, self-created debt, her vacation choice, etc.) 
  • Turning a positive into a negative (e.g., something good happens to you and she denigrates it, ignores it, and/or minimizes it.)  See below.
The Narcissist or Psychopath Hates your Independence and Personal Autonomy

I remember a while ago I started Facebook. I had left my part of the state and moved away to her half of the state because there "was no way she could live so far from her parents".

This was over ten years after having graduated from high school and I wanted to see how people were doing. I never planned on going to any reunion but I had two small cliques of friends that I had spent a lot of good times with. As I was moving on with life and getting married, I wanted to see how they were doing as well. I had heard many of them were starting to have kids, that some folks that were together since high school had gotten married and were having kids. It felt great to talk to these folks again and all the news I heard was so uplifting and I wanted to share my past friendships and their evolution with my partner.

One day, after hearing that my very best friend had his first baby...I bounded into the other room to tell her the news. When I told her that I had reconnected with a bunch of people with whom I hadn't spoken for years and that my high school best friend was about to have a baby she became infuriated.

I'm not kidding. This wasn't any kind of passive-aggression...she flipped her lid. How dare I go on Facebook "behind her back"? How was "she supposed to know" who I was talking to? Was I "talking to old girlfriends"? Obviously I was and obviously these girls were married, getting married or had moved out to God knows where doing God knows what. That didn't matter.

She then pronounced I was no longer allowed to use Facebook. I still did, of course, but at work and behind her back. I was ashamed. As my contact with my old friends started to fade, again, she had decided to open her own Facebook page.

What I'm about to say is no exaggeration. No spicing it up to make her sound bad. But the first thing she told me about her Facebook adventures was that she talked to "an old boyfriend from college" and how did I feel about that? I told her, that it was fine. We were married! What did a college boyfriend have to do with anything. About 5% of me knew what she was doing, but the rest of me was just like, "Oh, that's cool".

Soon after that, he started calling her cell phone and she wanted me "to take care of it". What the hell was she doing? After a few phone calls from this "ex-boyfriend" she told me that Facebook wasn't what she thought it was...that she was being silly and of course I could still go on there and talk to friends.

By that time the damage was done. I had alienated my friends. Even after she gave me permission to use Facebook again, I was very apprehensive about it. I didn't talk about much beyond the standard updates and friend requests.

Opportunity came and opportunity passed when friends had asked me to go out. Come back out for the day and have a cookout, go to a concert or just hangout. There was no way I was allowed to do any of these things without her. Going to a concert with my concert buddy was a tradition...it didn't involve our girlfriends. Not for any reason in particular...we were just music nerds that sat there talking about paradiddles and chord progression. Girls weren't very interested in what chord a song was in...we were.

So I had to pass, or cancel last minute due to her Munchhausen "emergencies" or other reasons.

After a while, they stopped asking.

Meanwhile, we were suddenly finding ourselves at her high school friend's weddings, going away parties, birthdays and graduation parties.

Fast forward to our divorce and she had used against me the fact that I had "withdrawn from my old friends".

Thursday, March 27, 2014

Whats Going on in Ukraine

Today's post brought to you by guest blogger, Brian Wolfson.

 I think at this point, we all know something is brewing in Ukraine. Euromaiden protests have led to usurpation of Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych and all out riots have broken out. What will happen though?

Earlier today, Vladimir Putin ordered troops into the Ukrainian peninsula of Crimea and the Ukrainian government sees this as an act of war while some pro-Russian residents see it as a godsend. America has condemned Russia for this action to no avail but the question is still there, what happens next? A popular consensus is that it is Russia trying to landgrab and start another Soviet Union. Some say that this is a catalyst for World War III.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Sharyl Attkisson Just Getting Started. Obama May Not Be Pleased.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

My Updated Comic Book Trading List

Here's my most up to date Needs List for trading. I'm mostly active on Facebook for trading comics, so reach me at Twitter @Comicsnut so I can give you my Facebook profile link with my For Trade list.

Hopefully you can find something you need and we can work something out!

Take care!

Hellblazer Trade Paperbacks
====================
Original Sins
The Devil You Know
The Fear Machine
The Family Man
Rare Cuts
Bloodlines
Fear and Loathing
Tainted Love
Rake at the Gates of Hell
Haunted
Setting Sun
Black Flowers
Papa Midnite
Stations of the Cross
The Gift
Empathy is the Enemy
The Red Right Hand
Joyride

Misc Trade Paperbacks
====================
Classic G.I. Joe - v04
Classic G.I. Joe - v05
Classic G.I. Joe - v06
Classic G.I. Joe - v10
Classic G.I. Joe - v15

Deadpool Classic (2008) - v05
Deadpool Classic (2008) - v06
Deadpool Classic (2008) - v07
Deadpool Classic (2008) - v08
Deadpool Classic (2008) - v09

Elephantmen - v04
Elephantmen - v05

Fatale -  v04
Fury MAX - v02

The G.I. Joe Order of Battle (1986) - v01

G.I. Joe (2008) - v 01
G.I. Joe (2008) - v 02
G.I. Joe (2008) - v 03
G.I. Joe (2008) - v 04
G.I. Joe (2008) - v 05

G.I. Joe: Snake Eyes (2011) v01
G.I. Joe: Snake Eyes (2011) v02
G.I. Joe: Special Missions - v01
G.I. Joe: Special Missions - v02
G.I. Joe: Special Missions - v03
G.I. Joe: Special Missions - v04

Glory - v01
Glory - v02

The Incredible Hulk (2000) TPB vol. 07
The Incredible Hulk (2000) TPB vol. 09
The Incredible Hulk (2000) TPB vol. 10
The Incredible Hulk (2000) TPB vol. 12
The Incredible Hulk (2000) TPB vol. 13

Invincible v17
Invincible v18
Invincible v19

Mind The Gap - v02
Mind The Gap - v03

Morning Glories - v04
Morning Glories - v05
Morning Glories - v06

The Punisher (2001) TPB vol. 02
The Punisher (2001) TPB vol. 03
The Punisher (2001) TPB vol. 04
The Punisher (2001) TPB vol. 05
The Punisher (2001) TPB vol. 06

Punisher (2004) - v 11
The Punisher: Frank Castle MAX (2009) vol 12
The Punisher: Frank Castle MAX (2009) vol 13

Punisher (2004) - v 11

Punisher War Journal  v01
Punisher War Journal  v03
Punisher War Journal  v04
Punisher War Journal  v05

Saga - v02

Scalped v06
Scalped v08
Scalped v09
Scalped v10

Star Wars: Knights Of The Old Republic v3-v6
Star Wars: Legacy v2-v7

Strikeforce: Morituri v 02
Strikeforce: Morituri v 03

The Goon v11
The Goon v12

The Walking Dead v19
The Walking Dead v20

Thief of Thieves - v02
Thief of Thieves - v03

Thunderbolts (2013) - 01
Thunderbolts (2013) - 02
Thunderbolts (2013) - 03

Back Issues
====================
Bigfoot: Sword of the Earthman  #3
Billy the Kid's Old Timey Oddities and the Ghastly Fiend of London (2010) 2-4
Billy the Kid's Old Timey Oddities and the Orm of Loch Ness (2012) 3, 4
Black Widow 2, 3
Hawkeye All
Hawken 01
Hawken 02
Hawken 03 
Hawken 04
Hawken 05 
Hawken 06
All Star Western - #13
All Star Western - #17
All Star Western - #18
All Star Western - #19
All Star Western - #20
All Star Western - #21
All Star Western - #22
All Star Western - #23
All Star Western - #24
All Star Western - #25
All Star Western - #26
All Star Western - #27
All Star Western - #28
Chew 37 and up
Daredevil (2011) #26 and up
Venom - #26
Venom - #27.1
Venom - #31
Venom - #32
Venom - #33
Venom - #34
Venom - #35
Venom - #36
Venom - #37
Venom - #38
Venom - #39
Venom - #40
Venom - #41
Venom - #42
Jonah Hex (2006) #1
Jonah Hex (2006) #1 (Special Edition)
Jonah Hex (2006) #1 (What's Next? Version)
Jonah Hex (2006) #5
Jonah Hex (2006) #20
Jonah Hex (2006) #21
Jonah Hex (2006) #50 (variant)
Deadpool  20 and up
Deadpool Kills Deadpool  #4
Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe  #2, 4
Deadpool MAX II  #3-6
Midnighter #9-20
ORIGIN II 1-3
Peter Panzerfaust - 09
Peter Panzerfaust - 10
Peter Panzerfaust - 11
Peter Panzerfaust - 12
Peter Panzerfaust - 13
Peter Panzerfaust - 14
Peter Panzerfaust - 15
Peter Panzerfaust - 16
Peter Panzerfaust - 17
The Punisher - #11
The Punisher - #12
The Punisher - #20-37
The Darkness (1996) #32-40
The Shade (1997) - #2-4
Todd, the Ugliest Kid on Earth (2013) - #5 and up
Venom (2011) #27.1, 31-42
Walking Dead 116 and up

G.I. Joe: Special Missions - #03
G.I. Joe: Special Missions - #05-#28
The G.I. Joe Order of Battle - #01
The G.I. Joe Order of Battle - #02
The G.I. Joe Order of Battle - #03
The G.I. Joe Order of Battle - #04
Tales of G.I. Joe (1988) - #02-13, #15
G.I. Joe: Snake Eyes - 01-04
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) Special 1
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) #21B
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) #32 ½
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) #36 ½
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) #150
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1982) #157-199

Long list of Daredevil after the jump...

Saturday, February 8, 2014

My Current Want List

This is my current Wants List for trading.  This one does not include my Daredevil back issue listing.  If you have back issues of Daredevil please let me know.

Trade Paperbacks
====================
Hellblazer:
Original Sins
The Devil You Know
The Fear Machine
The Family Man
Rare Cuts
Bloodlines
Fear and Loathing
Tainted Love
Rake at the Gates of Hell
Haunted
Setting Sun
Black Flowers
Papa Midnite
Stations of the Cross
The Gift
Empathy is the Enemy
The Red Right Hand
Joyride

Fury MAX 2
GI Joe v 4, 5, 6, 10, 15 and on....
Goon 11 and on....
Invincible v17 and on....
Scalped 9 and on....
Star Wars: Knights Of The Old Republic v3-v6
Star Wars: Legacy v-v7
Walking Dead v19 and on....

BACK ISSUES
====================
Amazing Spider-Man #50
Avengers #25
Avengers 57
FF #112
Incredible Hulk #1
Journey Into Mystery #89
Silver Surfer #4
Strange Tales #107
The Walking Dead #19

Jonah Hex (2006) #1
Jonah Hex (2006) #5
Jonah Hex (2006) #20
Jonah Hex (2006) #21

G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero Special 1
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #21B
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #32 ½
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #36 ½
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #150
G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero issues #157 through #197

Lady Mechanika -#0 (Cover F Long Beach Comic-Con 2010 Exclusive Cover)
Lady Mechanika -#0 (New York Comic-Con Variant)
Lady Mechanika -#1 (Cover C Incentive Joe Benitez Sketch)
Lady Mechanika -#1 (Cover D Campbell Incentive Variant)
Lady Mechanika -#1 (Cover E Benitez UniversalOutpost.com)
Lady Mechanika -#2 (Cover C Benitez Sketch Incentive)
Lady Mechanika -#2 (Cover D Garza Sketch Incentive)
Lady Mechanika -#2 (Cover E Benitez SDCC Exclusive)
Lady Mechanika -#2 (Cover F Comic-Central.com Exclusive)