Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I'm No Math Whiz

Until further notice, I'll be entitling my blog entries in the same fashion Frank Zappa named his songs.

Is anyone else getting a little tired of the relentless "overweight crisis" rhetoric in the media lately? To me, it's nothing but classism and elitism. I definitely don't need some guy with a British accent coming over here and telling us how fat we all are.

And why do we have so experts salespeople with some sort of British accent? Nannys that speak completely annoyingly, wasn't there some vacuum salesman that spoke very eloquently so we would think we weren't buying a vacuum, but some sort of really amazing product that smart people use. Also the guy that did a reality show with Billy Mays (he had a beard, which is another thing altogether). Do we think that if they put someone with an accent in front of them, the product is somehow different?

Really? Another movie spawned from an unfunny, awkward and poorly written SNL skit? There hasn't been a funny thing on that show since "Deep Thoughts"...and even then things were on the way down. I consider the Phil Hartman/Chris Farley/David Spade years the television equivalent of the Metallica album "...And Justice For All". It wasn't really good anymore, but it was the very last thing that was somewhat enjoyable. Everything since then has been garbage...both on SNL and from Metallica. SNL just put Jimmy Fallon and his fat friend on camera and the would giggle at each other...cuz, man we all know how funny it is when people are doing live TV and might crack up...woah...groundbreaking stuff there. Oh, and make sure makeup and hair spend hours on Jimmy Fallon's hair to make it look like hair and makeup didn't spend hours on his hair.

If Obama and Pelosi are in the middle of the ocean and their boat starts sinking, who gets saved? America.

An Avatar sequel? I still haven't stopped gagging from the effects the first movie had on my digestive system.

Please, just make more LotR movies. Get The Hobbit: Part 1 in front of me please.

My wife and I have a certain couple we're friends with. She calls me her Republican Husband and she's my Republican Wife. Neither of our respective spouses are particularly political...but they definitely vote GOP. This was her Facebook status this morning.

DEAR LORD, THIS YEAR YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTOR, PATRICK SWAYZIE. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTRESS, FARAH FAWCETT. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE SINGER, MICHAEL JACKSON. I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW, MY FAVORITE PRESIDENT IS BARACK OBAMA. AMEN


Love her.

Anyway, Wednesday nights are the only night I really look forward to watching on TV. The Middle, Modern Family and Cougartown are three well written shows that I really enjoy. Granted, they feature characters and relationships a typical Republican would find distasteful - but I'm willing to let it pass and just enjoy the shows.

Tonight, however, they are all repeats and I need to catch up on Lost. I've not seen a single episode this season and my co-worker is going nuts in his need to discuss what's going on. So, that provided the opening to catch up. I'm watching Episodes 1 and 2 tonight as I type, and I hope to catch up in time for next week. Lost is a great show and it makes for great water-cooler talk. The last show I truly "followed" in a way similar to this was The Sopranos and before that, The X-Files. That inbred family episode still gives me the willies.

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