Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Number #200 goes to...Superman Reboot

The Superman reboot.

I.  Love.  Superman.

So, what more fitting a topic for me to beg my readers to help me think of come up with on my own in celebration of post number 200 here at The Jar.

I grew up wanting to be him, I had the Underoos. I would jump from couch and land on my face soar off into the air with my cape and rescue toy soldiers citizens.

By the way, do a GIS for superman underoos - you'll be pleasantly surprised that they ain't just for little boys anymore.

First of all, when I had heard the initial rumors of this I was petrified.  The reason I was petrified was because the Wachoski brothers were reported to have a hand in it.


Not only did they destroy the only good film they made, The Matrix, by creating two overly long, preachy, ridiculously over CGIed sequels...they are also responsible for Speed Racer.  I shall not venture into anymore thoughts on that, as I am near out of industrial office cleaner and will be unable to clean my desk of vomit with any manner of ease.

I then heard they were out...yaysauce!

Slowdown, champ.  Brett Ratner was slated for the job next!!!  Thus, I quoteth the Brothers Warner:
Warner Bros. announced today plans for a brand-new Superman franchise with the first film, SUPERMAN ADVENTURES, to be helmed under the guidance of Brett Ratner (giggle) (RUSH HOUR (giggle), X-MEN: THE LAST STAND(GIGGLE!!!!)).
“Brett’s work ethic (giggle) and adherence to our strict set of studio guidelines (giggle) is what made us choose him to shepherd (giggle) this new franchise to the world,” said Gary Ullsman, senior VP of Warner Bros.  “We knew he could pump out a Superman movie in two years flat (giggle), which is exactly what we wanted.”
Giggles added by me.  Movies studios don't usually put giggles in their press releases.  I do, however, when film companies release pressers and mention Brett Ratner.

Then rumors of Christopher Nolan starting popping up.  Needless to say; he done good - real good - with Batman.  But, I said it, however needless it may have been.

While the Donner (note the emphasis please) Superman movies are #1 on my list of comic book movies, #1b and #1c are Nolan's two Batman movies.  #2 is Howard The Duck.  That was a lie.  Yo, Howard the Duck sucked, for real like, yo.


Add to Nolan, is Zack Snyder (300, Watchmen, Dawn Of The Dead) and I'm rejoicing in my fanboi socks.  Even though I think Watchmen was an unreadable mess, and an unwatchable movie...not through any fault of Snyder...the movie is obviously incredibly well made...I'm just don't like socialist, anti-capitalist, anarchistic self-importance with my escapist entertainment.

So here we sit with Snyder and Nolan slotted to direct and produce, "The Man Of Steel" with scripter-supreme David Goyer (Batman Begins, Dark Knight, Blade II, Blade Trinity, The Crow: City Of Angels, and get this...a Scanners remake!)

To Luthor, or not to Luthor, that is their question.  All indications are pointing: not to Luthor.  If you've been reading Superman lately, the Brainiac storyline into the New Krypton storyline into War Of The Supermen storyline was great.  Then J. Michael Straczynski went on to try and make Superman more human by walking, not flying, across the country on foot, all pensive like, tying up drug dealers (get it?  so that Kal-El can be more in touch with Earth?)

It's...been...done  - much, much more imaginatively and by people much, much better than you, J.  Sorry.


So, yes.  I vote yes on the Superman reboot.  Superman Returns was good, I've always meant to buy it on DVD or BD, but I always end up finding something a little better.

Some Scanners goodness after the jump...



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