Thursday, November 4, 2010

Post Of The Year Candidate

Via Iowahawk:

You have 24 Unanswered Messages


Hello, this is Congressman Chuck Harbinson calling to remind you to vote tomorrow, Tuesday November 2nd. As your representative from the 3rd District, I have worked hard to bring positive change through my support for the Health Care Reform Act, as well as the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act which created the new Turnip ethanol plant and nearly a dozen new high-paying jobs right here in the Quint Cities. I am proud to have earned the endorsement of the Claxon-Ledger, the United Turnip Workers Union, and President Obama. So when you cast that vote tomorrow, Tuesday November 2nd, won't you please pull the lever for me, Congressmen Chuck Harbinson? Thanks, and have a great evening.


Hello, this is Congressman Chuck Harbinson again. Look, I just wanted to make sure you didn't get the wrong impression from that last robocall. I think I mentioned something about an endorsement from President Obama. Okay, yeah, he endorsed me, technically, but really, don't read too much into that. It's really more of a formality kinda thing. Candidly, I'm considered a pretty big independent here in DC, reaching across the aisle and all that. So pull that lever tomorrow for me, Congressman Chuck "The Maverick" Harbinson.


What exactly do we know about Mike Pflugenboom?...
Read the rest there...

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Pelosi, Ready For Private Sector

Armed with an empty resume, with the exception of the words "Epic Fail", Pelosi was asked about what her plans were now that she's been shown the door.  Her answer:
"I'll let you know"
Alright, Nance...we'll be waiting.  We can't wait to see what you take on next!  You did such a bang up job as Speaker, you're bound to make it anywhere!  Hell, nobody puts baby in a corner.

Funniest Comment Of The Day!

 Over at "rumproast" someone named "Betty Croaker" issued forth the following gem:
It’s a terrible shame to see Pelosi lose her gavel. But she’s without question one of the most accomplished Speakers to ever wield it.
That's as rich as I've seen.  It was hard to wade through all the sophomoric "teabaggers", "teatards", "conservatives are racists and hate fags"...but it was worth it - to find that nuggy. 

In case you need to laugh a little more, here's a video of some liberal crying over a rainbow.

Best lines:

"What does it meeeean????"

"OMG it's a double complete rainbow...right in my front yard!!!  WHAT DOES IT MEAAAAN!?! TELL ME!!! TOO MUCH...I GOT WHAT IT MEANS!!!"

Excuse Me, Waiter?

I'll have the Lame Duck President with a GOP majority Congress side please.  Thank you.

I might as well get on with the celebrating, the rest of the country is, so I gotta get on board.

It's just terribly frustrating, I don't even know how to describe it.  I mean, WE sent Scott Brown to the Senate.  I thought MA voters were getting somewhere.  I mean, Barney isn't going to be chairman of anything except his "spouse's" brothels probably.  Or maybe he can help sell the weed that's grown up at his buddy's house in ME.  Who knows, but this guy belongs in the private sector.  Out there with the rest of us that he hates so much.

And you remember damn well how much he hates us, right?

I hate him just as much.

I Am Still Locked In This Godforsaken House

Yes, that's right.  It does.
So, nationally I'm pretty happy.

Locally, it can't be anymore pathetic.  It truly can't be.

How much damage does someone have to do in order to be held accountable in MA?  How can someone as classy as Sean Bielat not win against Barney The Clown?

Voting no on question 3 simply meant my fellow Komrades lack the understanding of what taxes means...or they actually believe crap like "We'll lose all our police, fire trucks and teachers".

Either way......uninformed voters just handed me another 4 years of nearly nothing.

I mean, did Barney Frank not destroy the housing market enough for them to hold him accountable? If he had literally walked around burning houses to the ground would people have understood what he did to this country?

So discouraging...guaranteed he runs unopposed next time. People will just say, "The MA electorate want this kind of stuff, they don't understand screw 'em".

Sadly, people like myself that don't allow ourselves to become beholden to Union thugs, are left footing the bill while the rest of the people eat, then run home to watch Judge Judy.

I ain't nearly done...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

This, In Celebration Of The New Direction

I'd been fiddlin' with the blog's template for a while, and what better time for "change" than November 2, 2010.

I Want To Play

I hope I can play today.

For years, as a Полноправным членом Народная Республика Массачусетс, I have been that little boy living with a weird, grumpy old lady that would steal your ball if it went into our yard while you were playing.  I was never allowed to go outside and play.

One time, when she was highly medicated and dozing off in front of Judge Judy (she doesn't have a job), I went outside and joined your game of kickball.  There was a kid on second base and I kicked the ball pretty goodThat kid scored and I was happy.

Like I said: for years I was never allowed to play.  I want to play now.  I want to be a part of this.  After I kicked that ball, some of you befriended me, you realized that it wasn't was the kook I lived with that was ruining it for everyone else.

That lady I live with truly believes that Barney Frank was not responsible for the collapse of the housing market.  She's also never heard of One United Bank.  She thinks Deval Patrick is handsome and is thus deserving of a governorship, even after creating the worst environment this state has ever seen...and that's hard to do - it's MA for crying out loud.  In any other universe, Barney Frank would be accountable for his actions and wouldn't even be running.

These are our questions today and how she will vote:
  1. Do you want to remove the double tax on alcohol?
    She will vote: NO.  As you can see, it is being taxed twice: an excise tax and the sales tax (more on the sales tax later).  She will vote nay because she doesn't understand the question and mostly because she saw a yard sign that said "No on #1" and that same house also had a Deval Patrick sign.
  2. Do you want to stop funding "affordable housing"?
    She will vote: NO.  She really doesn't understand this one.  But someone, somewhere said something about this will affect poor people.  And she feels badly for poor people.
  3. Would you like to have more money in your pocket?
    She will vote: NO.  Because if we do that the state will "have to make cuts".  Those cuts won't come in the form of better economical spending.  They won't come by cutting phony baloney jobs gotten via nepotism.  They will come by having to fire "police, firemen and teachers".  They might even have to close some libraries. 
I mean, money is literally being dangled in front of us.  MONEY THAT WAS OURS TO BEGIN WITH!!!  But my simple minded Komrades won't take it...they are perfect prey for the politics of fear. This will make two years in a row we could have given ourselves a raise but failed to do so, because the fuckwitardiots at our state capital know their electorate very, very well.

One third of their electorate is completely dependent upon them for everything, another third only votes D (no.matter.what) and is easily misled...leaving the other third peering out the window wishing it could play with the other kids, silently sorry that the old lady is ruining it for everyone else.

Bottom line is:  Deval needs to go, Barney Frank needs to go.

I hope I can play today.

    Monday, November 1, 2010

    Do You Honestly Think This Is the "Right Direction"?

    One arm of this administration, the Judicial Branch, is doing its best to ensure more D's get votes.

    Another arm, grown from who knows where, is doing its best to make sure those that are fighting for our Republic and the precious right to vote...DON'T get to vote.  Because it's pretty clear who everyone in the military would vote for...except, you know...Mulism extremist fundamentalist terrorists.  Oh wait, he's not a terrorist, he just "didn't want to get deployed". 

    Pay no attention to the Obama behind the curtain, he's busy keeping the country safe from terrorist attacks.  So busy, in fact, that only minute, non-terroristy things like this have happened under his awesome, hope-filled two years.  I mean, the guy can't stop everything.  Bush probably hired Hasan when he was leaving office, to setup Barry to look bad...yeah!

    Oh, and the unbiased MSM (only FOX News is biased, and can't be trusted) is even more moist today than it was Friday as they, yet again, attempt to fabricate and create stories against Conservative politicians.

    Even with all the help, Obama's band of idiots will be very, very unemployed tomorrow.

    Brett Favre Press Conference Transcript

    I'll just paraphrase it:

    11 questions. 
    217 self-references.
    19.7 self-references per answer.

    To put this into perspective, here is Tom Brady's post game stats (hehe):

    7 questions.
    53 self-references.
    7.5 self-references per answer.

    Also, for more perspective...Obama, in his State Of The Union speech, said "I" 96 times in 72 minutes.  That means Obama talked about himself every 45 seconds - when he was to be speaking about the "State" "Of" "The Union".

    Sunday, October 31, 2010

    Why You Should Watch The Next Batman Sequel: The Dark Knight Rises

    Hollywood makes me sick.  For the most part they have no problem releasing, to much fanfare and Oscarage, movies that do nothing but criticize the United States, our policies or "the war".

    I was a huge fan of Band of Brothers, own the BD set and everything.  So when news came out that Hanks and Spielberg were going to do it again with The Pacific I couldn't wait.  One half hour into it I was disgusted

    First, in order to get their anti-American point across they decided to strip out any character development, which was what made Band of Brothers amazing. In order to create apathy within the audience towards the Americans you create a faceless, laughing mob of idiots as opposed to developed characters.  It doesn't need to be "Rah-rah, America's great! All soldiers are amazing", one simply needs to remember the characterization of Herbert Sobel from Band of Brothers.  With all due respect, he seemed incompetent and dangerous and was rightfully removed from authority.

    One of the earliest scenes in the first episode showed American soldiers having fun with a Japanese soldier.  The Japanese soldier was trapped in the open and the Americans were laughing at him, shooting at him while purposely missing, "making him dance" so to speak.  They lost me right there.  I was sucker punched, and should have seen it coming, honestly.  Hanks and Spielberg probably couldn't sleep at night knowing they've made two WWII pieces that left people feeling good about "The Good War".  So why not start production on something that even drew criticism from the actual people portrayed in the film.  Read Sterling Mace's book and you'll get the idea.

    So on to my point: Hollywood has no problem creating movies such as these that tackle the issue straight on, with all it's bloody, entrails filled "realism" to get across the message that "America is bad, mmmkay?". 

    Why are movies with conservative views always wrapped up in fantasy?  Lord of the Rings, Batman, Incredible Hulk etc.  If any of this sounds familiar it's because Andrew Klavan's famous, "controversial" column from the Wall Street Journal already tackled this issue - but with better skill and clarity than I could ever hope to write.  Because it's been archived, here it is in it's entirety:
    A cry for help goes out from a city beleaguered by violence and fear: A beam of light flashed into the night sky, the dark symbol of a bat projected onto the surface of the racing clouds . . .

    Oh, wait a minute. That's not a bat, actually. In fact, when you trace the outline with your finger, it looks kind of like . . . a "W."

    There seems to me no question that the Batman film "The Dark Knight," currently breaking every box office record in history, is at some level a paean of praise to the fortitude and moral courage that has been shown by George W. Bush in this time of terror and war. Like W, Batman is vilified and despised for confronting terrorists in the only terms they understand. Like W, Batman sometimes has to push the boundaries of civil rights to deal with an emergency, certain that he will re-establish those boundaries when the emergency is past.

    And like W, Batman understands that there is no moral equivalence between a free society -- in which people sometimes make the wrong choices -- and a criminal sect bent on destruction. The former must be cherished even in its moments of folly; the latter must be hounded to the gates of Hell.

    "The Dark Knight," then, is a conservative movie about the war on terror. And like another such film, last year's "300," "The Dark Knight" is making a fortune depicting the values and necessities that the Bush administration cannot seem to articulate for beans.

    Conversely, time after time, left-wing films about the war on terror -- films like "In The Valley of Elah," "Rendition" and "Redacted" -- which preach moral equivalence and advocate surrender, that disrespect the military and their mission, that seem unable to distinguish the difference between America and Islamo-fascism, have bombed more spectacularly than Operation Shock and Awe.

    Why is it then that left-wingers feel free to make their films direct and realistic, whereas Hollywood conservatives have to put on a mask in order to speak what they know to be the truth? Why is it, indeed, that the conservative values that power our defense -- values like morality, faith, self-sacrifice and the nobility of fighting for the right -- only appear in fantasy or comic-inspired films like "300," "Lord of the Rings," "Narnia," "Spiderman 3" and now "The Dark Knight"?

    The moment filmmakers take on the problem of Islamic terrorism in realistic films, suddenly those values vanish. The good guys become indistinguishable from the bad guys, and we end up denigrating the very heroes who defend us. Why should this be?

    The answers to these questions seem to me to be embedded in the story of "The Dark Knight" itself: Doing what's right is hard, and speaking the truth is dangerous. Many have been abhorred for it, some killed, one crucified.

    Leftists frequently complain that right-wing morality is simplistic. Morality is relative, they say; nuanced, complex. They're wrong, of course, even on their own terms.

    Left and right, all Americans know that freedom is better than slavery, that love is better than hate, kindness better than cruelty, tolerance better than bigotry. We don't always know how we know these things, and yet mysteriously we know them nonetheless.

    The true complexity arises when we must defend these values in a world that does not universally embrace them -- when we reach the place where we must be intolerant in order to defend tolerance, or unkind in order to defend kindness, or hateful in order to defend what we love.

    When heroes arise who take on those difficult duties themselves, it is tempting for the rest of us to turn our backs on them, to vilify them in order to protect our own appearance of righteousness. We prosecute and execrate the violent soldier or the cruel interrogator in order to parade ourselves as paragons of the peaceful values they preserve. As Gary Oldman's Commissioner Gordon says of the hated and hunted Batman, "He has to run away -- because we have to chase him."

    That's real moral complexity. And when our artistic community is ready to show that sometimes men must kill in order to preserve life; that sometimes they must violate their values in order to maintain those values; and that while movie stars may strut in the bright light of our adulation for pretending to be heroes, true heroes often must slink in the shadows, slump-shouldered and despised -- then and only then will we be able to pay President Bush is due and make good and true films about the war on terror.

    Perhaps that's when Hollywood conservatives will be able to take off their masks and speak plainly in the light of day.

    Mr. Klavan has won two Edgar Awards from the Mystery Writers of America. His new novel, "Empire of Lies" (An Otto Penzler Book, Harcourt), is about an ordinary man confronting the war on terror.
    Emailing this to a liberal is one of my favorite pastimes.  I especially love mentioning that Nolan might be a closet Conservative to people at comic shops, or on other comic forums - it drives liberals nuts (careful, that's a Daily K0$ link, you might get some on you).  If you listen carefully, you hear nothing about this from Nolan.  Admitting you're a conservative in Hollywood is a death sentence, unless you've established yourself first.

    Imagine that!?  The biggest comic book movie mega-hit out of Hollywood might have a conservative slant to it!  The mere image of their precious liberal comic book bus being driven by a conservative is enough to make them froth at the mouth and convulse with complete terror.

    The best part?  They can't use their first three cards they typically use in a debate.

    1) That's FOX News. (It was printed in the WSJ)
    2) Well, if George Bush didn't put us in that position in the first place. (Irrelevant)
    3) That's racist. (Irrelevant)

    All they can do is go straight to ad-hominem.  It's great stuff.  And it's why you need to go see the next Batman movie when it's released.