Sunday, April 17, 2011

Crazy Condo Cabal Lady Update

Ok, things are getting pret-ty, pret-ty, pret-ty, pret-ty, pret-ty, creepy around the new house.

I had to call the police on the lady next door the other week.  It was Sunday morning, I had pulled into the driveway after going out to get a cup of coffee.  When I got out of my car and started walking towards my door, she came out of her condo and started ranting and frothing at the mouth at me.  Calling me a "Fucking scumbag", "Asshole" and "Stupid".

She was upset that I had parked my car crookedly a few days or so before that, apparently.  So, I called the cops asking them to please tell her to leave me alone.  As you may remember, she is on the Condo Association so when the cops came and were done talking to me, they went to talk to her.  They then came back and had the president, this nutbar's friend, in tow.  Weird that the Association President went rushing to her aid, no?

We were told by the cops to "knock it off" etc.  They didn't really listen and told us all to act like adults and ignore each other.  We agreed and were told she agreed.

Fast forward a few weeks and the lady approaches my wife outside...after we made it very clear to leave us alone.  She tells me wife she doesn't want to live like this and that we don't have to be best friends but let's drop it.  My wife called me at work to tell me this, I tell her fine...but we'll see.  Sounded a bit strange to me. 

My wife is a bit naive, she grew up very well off.  I grew up in an inner city.  People are not your friends.  People will cut you the first chance they get. My wife has learned this lesson a few times already...and she's learning it again.

Fast forward to 20 minutes ago.

My wife is upstairs putting the baby to sleep, I'm in my office playing with my toys organizing my Scaled Action Figure Collection when there's the doorbell rings.  It's the cops.

"What.  The.  Fuck.  Now?"  I think to myself.

Are you ready?  Sit down.  Get take a sip of your drink.

Got it?


The cop says, "May I come in and speak with you please?"

Me: "Of course, what's up?"

Cop: "Are you having a problem with the lady next door?"

Me: "Yes, you wouldn't believe it..."

Cop:  "Try me..."

Me: ....tells story....

Cop: "Well, we were called here tonight by your neighbor...didn't you notice us and the fire department outside?"

Me: "What?!  No!  What happened?"  Thinking I'm about to get charged with a murder I didn't commit.

Cop:  "The woman next door is called us because she is scared of the two of you."

Me: "What?"

Cop: "She says you guys are playing blank CDs with hidden messages and crawling around in her crawl space pumping foul smelling gas into her house, making her house pressurize and depressurize like an airplane."

Me: "......................................................"

Cop: "I know...I made her repeat that claim in front of the firemen...who promptly turned around and left.  I sense there's a mental problem there"

And the blank CD was turned all the way up to full volume....
Me: "DUH!" (Not really, I said...I know she's done some whackadoo things and told him about following  us around the property and staring in our windows etc)

Cop: "So, any kind of harassment claim she makes against you, because of this...isn't going to happen".

Me: "Wait a minutes, are you telling me she's trying to ramp up some kind of claim against us?"

Cop: "Maybe, but it isn't going to happen.  No one would take this seriously...I just had 5 witnesses to her making chaotic statements and claims"

Me: "Ok, now I'm afraid of her.  My wife is alone here sometimes with her creeping around.  Do we need to get some kind of order against her now?"

Cop:  "I wouldn't advise it yet, for any kind of claim here in the state there needs to be three documented 'events'"

Me: "Well, I can list 'em off for ya!"

Cop: "I'm going to go over and explain what harassment is and if you don't see it stop, I'd advice getting counsel."

Me: "Ok"

Cop: "Because you know about this same thing last week, right?"

Me: "WHAT?!?"

Cop: "ooooooh....uhmmm....well....there's a report that a crazy lady came to the police department to get us to come arrest you for sending these messages and the funny smells.  Obviously we blew it off"

Me: "WHAT?!?!!?!?!!?!"

Cop:  "Yeah, so you're saying she came up to you how many days ago to make peace?"

Me: "My wife...2 days ago.  As a matter of fact, she asked my wife if my wife was able to hear her music through the walls"

Cop: "Well...she wanted to have you arrested last Sunday.  A week ago today".

Me: "Holy shit.  She's crazy!"

Cop: "Affirmative"

So, the cop told me where I can get the report, what to do if something else happens etc etc and left, laughing saying he's been thinking of buying a condo, but this might have just stopped him. LOL!

So, coincidentally...the owner of my local comic shop is a lawyer as well and I've been telling him about this ongoing situation.  I plan on getting counsel anyway.

At the very least this woman cannot be acting as a board member.  All her actions, because she's a board member, are reflective of the board.  So in essence the board just accused us of pumping subliminal messages into her unit.  And, because she did things as an individual, anyone else on the board can be named in any action for assets.

I'll be stopping by my comic shop tomorrow.


  1. I think that simply must be my mother living there. Sorry about her, she's always been that way.

  2. Paul J, just shoot the bitch and get it over with. I promise you that no jury will convict you, and her living chirrens will thank you! (If she ever bore chirren...which I somewhat doubt, due to the fact that she'd actually have to find someone retarded enough to have sex with her to bear chirren).

    I know that that is not a Christian comment, but my grace bucket got holes in it a LONG time ago for people with nothing to do, and all day to do it in, who CHOOSE to make life hell for others.

    I see it ALL THE TIME.

    Shoot the bitch...

  3. It's insanity...I'm truly at a loss with this nutbar.

  4. Paul, when dealing with bizarre things that women do, and talking to men about it, all you really have to say is "SHE." We all understand. Yes, the particulars change and we need to hear that, but they all act like that.

    Yes, there are literally six women in the whole world that are exceptions that PROVE the rule.


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