Saturday, September 17, 2011

Obama + The Constitution = Toilet Paper

I hate you and your stupid Constitution
It's obvious to anyone with half a watt of voltage running through their brain-matter (that automatically excludes 24% of the country) that Bamm-Bamm doesn't give two shites about the United States Constitution.  Sidenote, who in the world can "Strongly Approve" of this thunderously idiotic boy-man?  How can 1 quarter of our country still be "Strongly" supportive of this guy?  What needs to happen for them to disapprove?  Does he need be playing air drums to some Jay-Z song and accidentally launch some nukes into the California mountains?  Does he need to lose control of his bladder during one of his Presidential Screeches and piss his pants?  Maybe he needs to get on TV and actually tell people to fuck off, instead of fucking us all behind closed doors.

So anyway, the Washington Times had a nice Op/Ed piece from writer Robert Knight listing the ways in which this donkey has either ignored, violated or otherwise defecated upon your Constitution.  You see, the Constitution was put in place so people like him cannot gain power.  It's basically an instruction manual for avoiding a Barrack Obama.

It's almost like when they were writing it, they had just gotten back from a time travelling experience with Doc and Marty to the year 2011 (because they wanted to see what it was like the year before the Mayan calander ends) and saw the state of the nation.  They watched him screaming at Congress on TV (once they got used to the idea of TV, Marty charmingly explained to them what it was because they thought we now keep our presidents trapped in little boxes so they cannot be harmed) and were in shock.  They had just fought tirelessly and lost many Americans to gain independence against this type of tyranny, fascism and totalitarianism.  They had to do something.


Eat Lead, Slackers
Terrified, they had to get back to their time and draft some kind of protection against exactly this type of president.  Unfortunately, because the DeLorean was so poor in gas efficiency they were pulled over and thrown in the slammer by the future great-grandchild of the school principal.  They were also met by protests from animal rights activists as they were led into prison because the clothes they were wearing were fashioned from real leather.  The Delorean was impounded by the tow-truck operator (the great-grandchild of Biff) and they sat in jail until a plan came together and they were able to find a place to get the car up to 88mph.  They could not, in good conscious allow this future to happen (despite warnings from Doc that messing around with the space time continuum could have dire, unforeseen consequences).  Doc tells them it could mess things up so badly for so many people, the outcome could be harmful to so many people.  The climax comes when a camera slowly pans to their faces and they state, in unison, "We ARE the people".


There was a musical montage in there somewhere as well.


So yeah, Bamm-Bamm has to "dodge, dip, dive, duck, and dodge" the Constitution because it's explicitly, not implicitly, designed to stop people like him.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

My Pull List for September 14, 2011

@DanSlott is writing one of the greatest Amazing Spider-Man runs in the title's history.


What a terrible ending to what is arguably one of the greatest Marvel heroes ever. Hundreds upon hundreds of books and the run ends with "Angry White Man". It's a shame.


This, however, is making up for it. Awesome new volume.




Disclaimer in case you're laughing at me: I've never been a big DC reader other than Jonah Hex. So I picked the new #1's that looked like the coolest characters.


ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz.


I think this looks awesome, I love Frankenstein, and whatever SHADE is, I hope it's a cool place to work.  Oh yeah, and it's Jeff Fucking Lemire!


This book is a hoot. I LOVE it.


See above disclaimer.


Even without an ending to Choker anywhere in sight, I will buy anything McCool does.



Love me some Punisher. And this title is brutal, fully living up to the MAX imprint.


As creepy a book (comic or otherwise) I've read in a long time. And there's only been one issue so far.


Again, see disclaimer.



Does anything else need to be said about this title? It's awesome.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

We Can Only Believe The Actions, Not The Words

What do these actions tell you?

During a moment of silence in London England. Some fuckpuke Islamofascist terrorists decided to disrupt it and put on a little demonstration of their "Religion of Peace:




I'm sure they are simply upset about the treatment of Muslims in the post 9-11 world, right?  That they've been victims in all this.

They're outraged that the TSA strip searched a dying cancer patient because she wore adult pullons due to her incontinence.  They're probably protesting the fact that a "minority" of them have caused a 4 year old girl to suffer through a stranger stuffing their hands down her pants to check her privates.

These are just the minority, right?

Islam is the Religion of Peace right?  Those two guys holding up signs talking about the upcoming domination of Islam are referring to a Polo match, right?